jueves, 9 de agosto de 2012

Frases con Encanto 2

He aquí la continuación de las sabias palabras de aquel profesor de Derecho Penal, donde puede verse con más claridad la forma de ser de este hombre. Próximamente añadiré más capítulos a estas Frases con encanto, pero ya no serán de este profesor, sino de otros muchos, que fui recopilando a través de bastante tiempo. Por cierto, mi favorita de esta tanda es la número 67.

46. Si te matan y descuartizan la medicina forense lo acredita con facilidad.
47. La sociedad espera que el sujeto activo olvide su ornamenta.
48. Cóctel moloto.
49. La sociedad ha cambiado 160º desde la dictadura.
50. Yo no me precio.
51. Todo lo que viene de Despeñaperros parriba, según Franco, es el resultado de una conspiración judeo-masónoca.
52. Yo tengo el don de hablar muy claro.
53. Yo nunca hablo gratuitamente.
54. El delito se comete con el coco.
55. El ladrón roba las joyas en casa del chalet de la víctima.
56. Yo soy muy cabezón. A mí no me lleva nadie.
57. Los fusiles automáticos son mortales.
58. De caza, en un matorral, se mueve algo. No se sabe si es una persona o un venao, pero no la canción.
59. Este tema del fúrbol va muy mal.
60. Yo odio la mentira.
61. Tendré todos los defectos del mundo, pero mentiroso no soy.
62. Tengo una editorial que está detrás mía para que se publique mi libro. Si queréis os enseño el contrato; no es broma.
63. Una persona lleva 20 años siendo un cajero fiel de los crminólogos... .
64. Conocí una vez a una mujer que no estaba en este mundo... .
65. IGNORANTE: Persona que va a las tertulias y sabe de todo pero no sabe de nada.
66. Tan ignorante es quien cree en el aborto como el que cree que el gobierno de Aznar va a hacer algo de utilidad.
67. ERROR: Persona que sabe, pero no sabe los agujeros negros. Sabe los planetas, pero no el genoma humano, porque no todos pueden saberlo.
68. Yo me precio de ser muy humilde, y he pedido muchas veces perdón.
69. Yo, como dice Sócrates, soy finito.
70. A mí no me sienta mal que los alumnos me aprueben. A otro sí.
71. El profesor Martos no regala aprobados a pesar de lo que digan otros.
72. ¡Cómo se nota que yo domino la criminología también! ¡Ja, ja!
73. Hay quien le gusta que le adornen porque hay masoquistas.
74. El enamorao dice: Espérate mi arma, que te voy a traer una estrellita pa que te la ponga.
75. Nosotros somo el 70% intelecto y el 40 % voluntad.
76. Un hombre patológico que deseca mariposas para atraer a una chavala que también deseca después... .
77. Los pilotos suicidas han generado muchas vidas inocentes.
78. Batman se queda conmigo en pastillitas.
79. Yo no soy persona de convicciones una hoy y otra mañana.
80. ... esto es así incluso en el lugar más lejano del mundo, incluso en el lugar más perdido, incluso en Barbate.
81. En la cárcel el analfabetismo y la educación brillan por su fuero.
82. Voy por la carretera, tengo hambre, y entonces me paro en un servicio.
83. Comer bien no es bocadillo y Coca Cola, sino cuchillo y tenedor, tres platos, postre y puro.
84. Para mí tan digno es un bedel como una limpiadora.
85. Un bedel y una limpiadora no pueden dar clase porque no todos tenemos el mismo material genético.
86. Le dicen a Martos por un pasillo: Qué suerte tienes de explicar la Teoríoa Jurídica del Delito. Y el responde: Sí que es verdad.
87. Yo sí sé valorar la experiencia.
88. La vida es la maestra.
89. Yo no soy confuso ni difuso.
90. ... en un pueblo de cuatro capullitos... .
91. El determinismo no mola.
92. Incluso en una aldea los tíos están al loro.
93. DUNKING: Posible delincuente de cuello blanco.
94. Hay señores muy buenos por ahí, pero a mí no me gustan, bueno, porque la gente va diciendo por ahí que el profesor Martos es...
95. Los intereses económicos son intereses bastardos.


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